Dear Fanny:

-
Fanny Alger is known, inside the church, as Joseph Smith's first plural wife. Others might say it was just a normal affair, covered up later as a plural marriage. Fanny was a young girl of about 16, and Joseph Smith was an adult of about 28. 

I found out recently that Fanny is my 5th great aunt.

Here is my letter to Fanny.

Dear Fanny:

    I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the way you were treated. I know that you were only doing your best to help while you lived with Joseph and Emma Smith. I'm sure you were a good worker. In fact, I bet you were a good friend and support to Emma. I can imagine you, and her, scrubbing dirt out of the laundry together and laughing as you hung each piece on the clothesline stretched outside. I know that your parents sent you there to help out with your family's finances. You were there to help two families, yet who helped you? 

    I'm sorry that Joseph Smith, who was supposed to be a prophet of God, took advantage of you.

    I don't know the real story, and I know that you want it kept private. However, I would bet that looking back on that time, you would admit that no matter how much "choice" you had in this union, it wasn't truly a choice. I'm sure that when you were 16 you looked up to, and even worshipped, the charismatic leader of the Mormon church. The sad part is that he knew you would be pushed into the relationship. There would be no way you could resist him. What would you do? You couldn't risk your eternal salvation. I imagine you scrubbing dishes in the kitchen, watching Emma and Joseph sitting together in the room next door, wondering if what "Brother Joseph" is asking of you could be right. I imagine you on your knees praying for guidance. What did God tell you? 

I can only imagine the torture you were put through each day that you had to keep your relationship a secret. I'm sorry for the heartache you must have lived through as you worked your way through this confusion.

The part I am most sorry about is personal. I'm afraid your family (my family) let you down. I hope they were there for you when you were kicked out of the home by Emma. I hope your mom held you and let you cry. I hope she let you tell her all about the fear and confusion. But I'm afraid they didn't. I'm afraid they were under the spell of Smith. I'm afraid they told you that what he did to you was blessed by God. I'm afraid they told you that you were chosen and should feel special. I'm sure they villainized Emma, your friend. They probably told you that she did not have enough faith in the prophet. I'm sorry they lived by blind faith.

I'm glad they took you out of Kirtland. I'm glad that you found your way to a real husband in Indiana. It seems you were happy. You deserved to be happy. I hope you were able to heal. But I'm sad that your parents left you. They left you, but not the church. They followed the church to Missouri; to Nauvoo, Illinois; and onto Utah. They were stalwart members of the church. I'm sorry for how you must have felt as they left you in Indiana to follow the person who changed your life forever. I wish I could reach out to you across the ages and help you heal.

But you probably don't need me; you are strong. You showed me what a survivor can do. And I promise you that I will never abandon my girls. I will never choose the church over them. I will support them in all of their decisions. I will be there when they need me to hold them and let them cry. I will fight for them no matter who is on the other side.

Thank you for your strength and courage. I will always admire that 16-year-old girl who stood up to a prophet and found her own path to happiness. 

Love,

Your Grandniece

Comments

  1. Diane JAugust 2, 2020 at 6:44 PM

    You're lucky to be a descendant of Fanny Alger. She was a survivor!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. P HaggardAugust 2, 2020 at 7:06 PM

      Too true.

      Delete
    2. UnknownAugust 2, 2020 at 9:48 PM

      Thank you for sharing Fanny’s story. Finding out about JS and his child extra brides really shocked me. I graduated from seminary and thought polygamy started with BY with BS story of not being enough men.

      Delete
    3. P HaggardAugust 3, 2020 at 8:57 AM

      Thanks for your comment. This same thing happened to me. Imagine my surprise when I realized I was directly related to this one young women. I sure wish we new more about her. This was my attempt at seeing her as a real person instead of the flat character of JS's first wife.

      Delete

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